announcements, epiphanies, and nonsense

Before I launch into a very self-centered post, I’d like to draw your attention elsewhere:

First, please send your love and support to Mrs. Bluemont.

Second, send your congratulations and warm wishes to j.k-c., who’s finally gotten knocked up! Congratulations!

And now, on to topics of the more self-centered variety.

It’s funny how we can go along with our lives feeling and thinking things, not paying much attention to them, while also never realizing that such feelings and thoughts aren’t so normal or useful. I honestly hadn’t noticed that I was so negative about this journey until I wrote that post the other day, so when I started reading all of your amazing and supportive comments, I was initially surprised. I wanted to say, “Oh, it’s really not that bad. I’m fine! Really!” And then J read it, and I came home from buying groceries, and she said, “I read your post. I didn’t know you were feeling so down. Let’s talk about this.” I burst into tears and realized that I did feel the things that I wrote, and those feelings were just as strong as they sounded, and I’ve been minimizing them. Blogging certainly does make for good therapy.

Over the last couple of days, I’m feeling better. This is due, in no small part, to the comments of some very dear people in blogland and the support of my beloved J. I’m very lucky to have this community, and it’s comforting to know that so long as I keep writing, people will be here. I like that. So thank you to those of you who responded with words of comfort and wisdom and to those who read and supported me in silence. It means a lot. I promise not to put my feelings into a garbage compactor anymore.

Moving along to better things (I know, nice transition): The California Supreme Court ruling has J and I in tears of joy every time we mention it. We’ve been domestic partners here for about four years ago. We had a commitment ceremony in 2001. Now we’re going to be able to get married. We don’t know yet how we’ll do it or when, but we will, and that’s exciting. Whatever it takes, we’ll finally be legally married. Our child(ren) will have married parents–unless of course, the fundamentalist freaks get their way and California voters pass a constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage. But we’re not going to let that happen.

As for this TTC business, I’m taking each day as it comes. I’m only 6dpo, so no symptoms of the fake or real variety to report, and I don’t think I’ll be reporting them. I’m tired of psyching myself out with super-sore boobs only to find that I’m just having one hell of a period. I am, however, eating tons of pineapple, although I realized I’ve got a whole bottle of bromelain capusules that would do the same thing. However, the pineapple right now is so sweet and delicious, I wouldn’t dare replace it with pills.

And that’s all for me this lovely Friday. The sun is already scorching, and we’re expected to reach over 100 degrees today. I’ll be expending most of my energy trying not to melt.

Happy weekend!