Category Archives: Hair

first haircut

Our boy has always had very fine, very fair hair, but he’s starting to get a fair amount of it in the back and on the top as evidenced below:

So, after finding our son with matted messes on the back of his head every time we have taken him out of his carseat of late, we decided it was time for his first haircut. Our lovely stylist told us when we first started going to her when he was just a couple of months old that she wanted to give him his first cut, so to our lovely stylist we went today.

Her first step was to hand him a comb and to cover me in a drape. She told me, “I’m sorry to say it, but he’s not going to like this.” Sure enough, he immediately asked her to put the comb back, “In! In!” he demanded pointing at her drawer.

She then quickly got started. Our stylist has two boys of her own, and she has given lots of first haircuts. She told us they always cry like she’s cutting out their brains. BG was no exception:

But in the end, he did survive, and he’s got a cute new big boy haircut to show for it. I only cried a little on our way out to the car. I held the envelope with the snips of his hair–the hair he was born with—and welled up at how much he has grown. Oh how I love my handsome boy.


Filed under Baby Genius, Hair

night weaning: night 1

Okay, so last night wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. It could have been worse, and it could have been better. I had so much anxiety that I couldn’t get to sleep until about 12:30, at which point my wife came out to tell me BG wouldn’t sleep anywhere but our bed. She opted to leave him there with her for awhile. Sadly, my poor J cannot sleep when she and BG are there alone together, so she was awake a lot of the night. Apparently he went down in his bed again around 4:00 and then woke her (and me) up positively wailing at around 5:15. She brought him out and asked me to come to bed and help out, which I did. This was the first BG had nursed since before he went to bed at around 6:30pm–the longest he has ever gone! Needless to say, he was very serious about his nursing once I got there. I’m okay with that, though, and I’m hoping that we can get to about 6:00 most days before he needs to nurse. That I could handle.

As for how the night itself went, apparently, BG only asked J to nurse once or twice, and one of the times, he was lifting her shirt hoping she would finally relent and let him nurse with her (he’s always been convinced that she should). Alas, she did not, and he fell asleep with some cuddles instead. One can’t blame the boy for being persistent! There were no tears between 12:30 and 5:15, which is far better than I had expected. Unfortunately, we’re all also very tired from the disruption in our usual sleep routines (and for J, just from staying up most of the night), but I’m hopeful that once BG is broken of his nighttime habit, the sleep will come longer and more easily. Tonight we’ll do the same thing (after J has a long afternoon nap). After going through it, I doubt I’ll have the anxiety I did, and I’m looking forward to the sleep.

In other news, if all goes well with his naptime, BG is getting his first haircut today! Photos to come, of course.


Filed under Baby Genius, Hair, sleep

sleepy head

First, a little business: If I left you a cryptic message on your blog about being nominated, please scroll down to the previous post; your award/nomination is below.

I have been waking up early the last couple of days to try to reset my internal clock. Soon, I will need to leave my home before 6:00am to teach two days a week. This will mean waking up no later than 5:00am. I can do this; I’ve done it before, but I haven’t done it lately at all. J and I have been staying up late and waking up late, and it has been wonderful, but it’s time to face the reality of scheduled sleep once again. Blech.

Also in preparation for teaching, J and I both got our hair cut yesterday. I feel like me again without the conservative, growing out all-American soccer mom look I had going. I don’t know that I’ve ever looked less like myself. But the growing out has ended, and I’ve got short, funky hair again. I’ve decided, after consulting with my stylist, to give it some color too. It won’t be drastic, but it will be more polished. She promises that we can deal with outgrowth without touching my scalp should I get pregnant in late October. I’m going to trust her because I’m tired of mousy brown. Even with chunks of blonde it was boring. J is just happy not to hear me complain anymore. I was complaining far too often about my hair. And speaking of J, she’s ultra hot with a sleek little bob ala Ni.cole K.idman in St.epford Wives.

Now that hair is dealt with, I have to finish planning the first half of the semester for both of my classes and find some professional clothes that won’t leave me melting into a puddle in front of 30 students. Luck will be needed.

Monday is on her way.

The brighter side of all this is that with teaching comes big girl paychecks and big girl benefits (from J anyway–and since we’re married, we’re now both entitled), and with big girl paychecks and big girl bennies, we get to shop for spermsicles. Today is CD1. Just two CD1s to go before we sperm up again. By golly, there is an end in sight!


Filed under Hair, sleep, teaching writing, ttc

this and that: disjointed ramblings of a newlywed with PMS

First things first: There is a new baby in the world, born to the lovely ohchicken. Welcome to the world, Sparky, and congratulations, Moms!

Thank you so much for all of your congratulatory comments. J and I have been overwhelmed with pride as we have watched and read news story after news story about couples being married and communities celebrating with them. This has been a great moment to be a part of, and we feel really lucky.

For the past couple of days, we have been putting together a scrapbook, cutting out articles from the paper, and sending out announcements. This weekend we’re going to my parents’ house to celebrate with them. It’s quite possible the celebration will be interrupted by the birth of my niece. I certainly won’t complain if that’s the case.

Otherwise, there isn’t much going on with us. I’m looking for a new donor, but I’m increasingly convinced that we just need to save up for frozen sperm. I’m just so tired of trying to sort out weird men.

For now, I’m going to tackle tasks that I can actually do something about:

1. I’m trying to find a new hairstyle that will ease me through this really awkward transition from short to longer-short hair. It was just my luck that I had tons of photos taken and appeared on the front page of a moderately significant newspaper with the hair from hell. Ack.

2. I’m working to find my motivation to lose weight again. Yes, I know, I’ve got all the motivation in the world if I think of having a baby. Blah, blah, blah. I used that in the months leading up to our first insemination, and it worked out well. For some reason, that doesn’t work anymore though, and maybe this is because it’s becoming harder and harder to imagine a baby in our future. I was having a hell of a time even remembering to take prenatal vitamins for the past few months. Anyway, this is something I’ll be working at again, and I’ll write more about this life-long struggle when it’s not triggering some crazy, cranky PMS hormones.

3. I’m going to plan my class for the fall. This can be a fun task, especially with the break I’ve had from teaching and with the prospects of new students, new colleagues, and new experiences. I may actually be prepared when the fall semester begins. That would be impressive.

I’m sure there’s more, but I think I’m done jumping from topic to topic for now. I’m confusing myself–one minute I’m joyous, another I’m bitter. Oh how I hate my hormones, especially when there’s not a chance in hell that these “symptoms” have anything to do with pregnancy. Ugh.

But I don’t want to end on a negative note, damnit. I started off talking about new babies and weddings and wonderful readers, so I’ll end with one of my favorite photographs from this week. It appeared in the SF Chronicle:

And if you’re interested in seeing more photos–and there are lots of tear jerkers–take a look here. Don’t miss the wedding album on the right of that page. I guarantee wet eyes all around.

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Filed under celebrations, craftiness, dear readers, diversions, family, Hair, health, marriage, Ramblings, The Great Sperm Search, The Long Break

appearance and identity for a 30-something queer girl

I’ve not disappeared entirely, and I’ve not sunken into a pit of despair. I suppose I just don’t have much to write about in the last few days.

We’re trying to wait until Friday to test. It’s 10dpo today. My period is due to arrive in a couple of days, so I’m just waiting it out without any expectations.

J and I have been doing our part to stimulate the economy by purchasing some summer clothes. Having lived in a climate with temperatures that never were above 75 for so many years, neither of us had  proper clothing to face the heat wave we had last week. Therefore, we’ve been finding a few gems here and there. I still won’t wear shorts, so this leaves me to skirts. Skirts make me feel more feminine, which I’ve needed lately. I rather like them. I’m even growing my hair out a bit to compound the girliness.

It’s not that I’ve ever been masculine or butch or even much of a tomboy. I have had short, cropped hair for awhile, but even that I always tried to maintain in a somewhat femmish style. Lately, though, when I’ve seen photos of myself, I haven’t liked how I looked. In fact, on more than one occasion, I did find myself looking more masculine than I’m used to, and perhaps this has sparked my interest in growing the hair and wearing the skirts. Who knows? I’ve never really been into the butch/femme labels because I’ve got a little bit of both in me. In fact, J and I both do, although crass straight folks still ask if I’m “the girl.” Whatever. We’re both the girls. There are no men in our relationship. That’s the way we like it.

So I suppose I’m playing a little with my outward expression of my identity again, and that’s fun. As I do this, I’m struggling also to avoid that gravitational pull toward the soccer mom look. You know, the high-wasted, pleated jeans and white sneakers and all the rest of the comfortable ugliness. J will tell you that I have an irrational fear of the soccer mom image. I think I just don’t want to look matronly. As someone who used to love nothing more than challenging the fashion status quo (oh how I loved my sequins, my safety pins, and my knee-high docs), the idea of taking on that oh-so-boring image frightens me. And yet, I know I’ve succumbed to it on many occasions. In fact, I’ve noticed lately that I dress a lot like my mom (not that my mom looks bad because she’s really lovely, but she’s also in her fifties, and I’m, well, not). Perhaps this is what happened when I started teaching and felt I needed to look more conservative. Perhaps it was a result of my body type and having to wear ugly plus-sized clothes for so many years. I don’t know, but sometime in the last ten years, I became a little dowdy, realizing some of my worst fashion phobias.

In the past few years, I’ve lost some weight, and with that has come multiple stages of image redefinition. Through all of this, I keep trying to look more my age–because I was starting to look much older than I am, and that’s no good. I still wish that I could get back a little of that edge I had in my early twenties, but I’m beginning to wonder if that will happen or if now that I’m in my thirties I’m just doomed to look like I should be piloting a minivan. Perhaps it’s just time for a new, highly visible tattoo.

People are always remarking that I never look the same from one year to the next. I used to have professors who, while I had taken their classes regularly, didn’t recognize me when classes started up again in August. I’ve always reveled in that a bit, and maybe my problem is that I just need to shed my skin of the last few years and grow a new one. Who knows–it might even be a little pink–but it certainly won’t involve white sneakers.


Filed under diversions, Hair, Ramblings, TWW

passing the time

First of all, a big, hearty congratulations to the girls over at Chronicles of Conception for their news! I think it’s time we had a whole gaggle of positives.

I haven’t gotten a positive ovulation test yet, but I have been thinking for about a month now that Friday or Saturday would be the potential eggdrop days for me this month. A message has been sent, and I assume our sperm will be on our doorstep Friday morning. I’m hinging a lot on this month–and the next one and the next one. After that, there’s no more Mr. G sperm for us, and we’ll be forced into either an extended break until we find a new known donor, or we’ll have to start buying the goods, and I am so utterly opposed to spending money on sperm when there’s so much of it out there for free.

This couple of days of waiting is killing me though. I’m ready to get the show on the road.

To pass the time, I’ve been engaging in hair removal today. I never thought I’d be one of those women who had to wax any part of her face other than eyebrows, but it seems that my thirties have brought with them fuzz and unwanted random dark hairs. I cannot handle this. I do not want to be a bearded woman, but I absolutely dread the pain of the hair removal. Alas, now I have an angry upper lip–but at least it’s a hair-free, feminine upper lip, right?



Filed under Hair, OPK, ttc

Inseminations, Hairstyles, and Other Miscellany

We had our second insemination yesterday. The timing this time around was much better, as it looks like I’m ovulating today. What wasn’t so great is that Mr. Goodman was on a business trip in the midwest meaning his overnight shipment took longer and had to go through many more severe temperature changes. In short, the poor swimmers went through a lot to get here. When it arrived, it was room temperature. We used it immediately, and we’re hoping that the strong ones still had enough  energy to make it to the egg. Despite this minor glitch, I think we have much better chances this time around.

We are hopeful that this may very well happen this month,  so now I’ve got to figure out something to do with my hair. Hair? you might ask. Yes. Hair. You see, I’ve been dying  my hair since I was something like thirteen, and I haven’t stopped since. It’s been platinum, black, all shades of red and blonde, and a few less natural colors as well. Right now, it’s bright blonde and fairly short, but it’s growing out. I’ve got about an inch of brown roots (I know, gross), but the thing is, if I’m pregnant, I don’t want to dye my hair. And, if I happen to get pregnant this month, I don’t want to be stuck looking like some sort of inverse skunk–or worse. To top it all off, my stylist of seven years had the nerve to move away, and I’ve been utterly stuck. 

 So today, J tried to convince me to shave my head. After I cried for a moment at the prospect of looking like a boy, I decided I could do it gracfully. We came very close to going to buy some clippers and doing it ourselves, but I’m very finicky about my hair, and I didn’t want some grown-out caveman style in a few weeks. Finally, we decided to go to this hip male stylist we met at a coffee shop to see if he’d help me out. He convinced me to wait a week for a little more outgrowth, but I’ve made an appointment with him, and we’ll see what happens!

We also went to farmer’s market today. We’ve been really enjoying lots of fresh, local, organic veggies lately, so we had to stock up for the first part of the week. The main farmer’s market of the week is on the town plaza. There’s always great live music, and all the local flavor comes out. It’s always a great family-friendly atmosphere, and the kids come out in full force. In fact, all those fresh veggies are really just a cover: in truth, we love to baby watch. There’s a huge grassy area in the center of the plaza, so we love to just sit and watch the little ones and the not-so-little ones enjoying the sun and the music and the atmosphere of our small town come to life.  We always leave wanting a baby even more though, so today it’s nice to know we may be on our way.


Filed under Hair, Summer, ttc