the unimaginable

As many of you know, our beloved Boy Genius lost his battle with leukemia last week–in fact, a week ago today. We are shattered and scarcely know what to do with our days now that the rhythm of caring for a boy is gone. I hope to write here again; in fact, I plan to spend a lot of time writing in the coming months as we try to piece our hearts back together. For now, I just want to thank all of you for all the support you have offered us. This community has played a huge part in keeping us afloat over the past six months. Your messages of remembrance this week have been heartbreakingly beautiful. We love you all. Thank you for being here. xo T and J

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22 Comments

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22 responses to “the unimaginable

  1. I can’t think of a better place for all of us to be. Grief is such a long hard road. I hope that this community can hold you in the years to come, and be a place of refuge and respect on your journey.

  2. I think about you all, all of the time. We are here for you always. Xoxo

  3. nutella

    We are here to listen and read. Haven’t stopped think of you. Just finished a Brown C0w maple yogurt, and thought of BG.

  4. We are here. Waiting and ready to surround you with all the love imaginable as you pick up the pieces. Thinking of you.

  5. Our “Caemon” t-shirt arrived yesterday. We will always think of your beautiful son when our boys wear it, and hope for a cure for his rare form of Leukemia. We are so very sorry for your loss, and can’t imagine how you are holding up when something this devastating happens. Peace and love.

  6. We’re always ready to have you back, whenever that is. I’ve been thinking of you.

  7. G

    Thank you for writing. For writing of your journey with him through his conception, to his birth, and his life. For allowing us, some of us complete strangers, to follow you and that sweet sweet boy on his journey. When I read the news, I was heartbroken and I came here to read. To read about how much he was loved, how smart, how generous, and about what a beautiful a soul he was. Thank you for chronicling his life and sharing it with us. I will continue to hold you and your family in my thoughts. BG truly touched many people’s hearts in his short amount of time here.

  8. We’re here too, reading, listening, holding you and that precious boy in our hearts! If there’s anything any of us can ever do to make your days easier, let us know.

  9. You are in my thoughts daily. I keep seeing crocodiles pop up everywhere. We are here when you are ready to write.

  10. I think of you all every day. It is unimaginable. I will forever donate blood in honor of your sweet boy. Hugs to you both.

  11. Helen

    Sending love, stength and peace. I have been familiar with your blog and BG since he was a little egghead, and found hope in your writing on my own difficult family building journey. I cannot stop thinking about you guys, and Caemon. I have worked with so many people, children in particular, who have moved me and stayed with me, in my long career as a social worker….somehow, your sweet, beautiful boy has found his way into my heart and has impacted me like no other….I am amazed that a little boy whom I have never met, had the ability to do that…there truly was something very special about him. I am heartbroken that this awful disease has taken him way too soon. My heart also breaks for you two, you are amazing moms, and I pray for your broken hearts to heal as much as possible from this tragic, devastating and cruel reality. I believe you will heal, in time. Caemon will always be the bright light, sunshine, your little angel who will guide you through. He will never be forgotten by so many. I hope to someday meet you two, the beautiful moms who had this amazing little soul. He lives in your hearts now.

  12. I have been so sad all week over your loss. There are no words that will heal your wounds. You are surrounded by love and support both in life and here online.
    Baylor and will look for Caemon in the sky.
    I am not going to die, I’m going home like a shooting star.
    Sojourner Truth

  13. tbean

    It is so nice to see you here. I have always loved to read your words–I am a junkie for good writing and you provide it in spades. As I’ve said elsewhere, I’m always thinking about you and J and BG. Always. If our support provides even a few fractions of ease or comfort in the face of your pain, I am glad.

  14. chunkandmommy

    So glad you are returning to this space. Your words and thoughts have always been beautiful and meaningful, and hopefully we can continue to support you. You are constantly in my heart and I am still wearing my croc tattoo with pride. Hugs and warm thoughts.

  15. I’m happy you’ll be writing here. I’m thinking of you and BG every day.

  16. Amanda Rogers

    So glad to hear that you will be writing here again. I think of you two and BG everyday. Still keeping you all in my thoughts and prayers. I never met BG in person but I talk to him at least once a day and ask him to keep an eye on his wonderful mothers. Of course I feel him smiling because no one has to ask him to do that, he just will, always.

  17. So much love to both of you. Xo

  18. Lucy

    Thinking of you and your beloved Boy Genius. So much love from our family to yours.

  19. I have followed your blog for a couple of years now, quietly lurking. It gave me hope for my own family one day. I became a very loyal follower back in August when BG became sick. I cried with you, I cheered with you when he got his transplant, and I prayed for you, for ultimate healing. I was devastated to hear of his lost battle last week. I remained quiet, until today. I needed to reach out and just let you know that there is one more family out there, thinking and praying and loving you all everyday. I know you have a lot of support, it’s amazing how many lives BG touched, but I also know in a moment like that, no amount of support is too much. We talk about BG and his wonderful moms often and can’t imagine the path you are walking now. We are sending all the strength and support we can from our side of the country. I will continue to follow along as your journey continues.

  20. Gia

    I don’t know what else to say…my words just don’t seem adequate enough during this time!

    I can only offer you my love and support and prayers!
    XXOO

  21. Thinking of you and your BG with warm thoughts and remembering the things BG loved such as kitchen appliances. May this blog and the community you created bring you comfort and support.

  22. Lex

    I’ve been offline for a while but wanted you to know how heartbroken I am to hear about your loss. BG was a terrific kid and through your writing, I feel as though I knew him a little bit, and for that I feel blessed. Take care of yourselves. I too am glad you’ll be writing here in due time.

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