a small update

Thank you all. The outpouring of support here is heartwarming during this surreal nightmare we’re going through. Today, we are in ICU with our boy because he has pneumonia on top of everything else. His tests yesterday had oddly inconclusive results. His oncologist (oh, fuck. fuck. fuck. He has an oncologist.) told us yesterday that it’s probably not the common childhood leukemia they thought it was, and is, perhaps, a much more rare variety. We are awaiting many more test results to find out what this is. The only comfort I take in this potential diagnosis is that this hospital is where the rare leukemia is most studied. No talk of success rates with this one though, only that it involves very aggressive chemo.

We are barely holding up. I alternate between just doing whatever it takes in the moment to keep our son comfortable to completely falling apart. J and I both fell on the floor of our room yesterday while our boy was in his surgery, and we bawled our eyes out. But crying doesn’t feel good, and honestly, neither does looking much farther than the next five minutes. We have to get him past the pneumonia first. Then we can deal with the cancer. (Oh, hell. I just wrote it, didn’t I?)

So many of you have offered to help, and I so appreciate it. If you live in our area, or you want to send something (as some of you suggested), you can email me at reproducinggenius at gmail dot com about it. I may try to come up with a PayPal donation link. I so don’t want to ask for money, but even a few dollars can help us with various costs we’re accruing as we go through this. More than anything, you can keep us in your thoughts, and keep providing these lovely comments here. It really does mean a lot to have this support.

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27 Comments

Filed under Boy Genius

27 responses to “a small update

  1. Please do create a paypal link, fo some of us, it’s the only way we can help. Thanks and my prayers are with your family.

  2. You two mamas and that darling boy have been in my thoughts constantly since your first post about this yesterday. I know that words are far from enough right now, but you truly are in our thoughts and prayers. We’re sending you all the strength and love that we’ve got in us.

    Come on, BG. Fight! We’re rooting for you.

  3. Kimberly M-M

    Been a lurker for a while – maybe I commented before, can’t remember. But, really, it doesn’t matter. My close friend’s son was diagnosed with leukemia in March. If you’d like to follow their caring bridge site to get a little “moral support” from someone who’s gone through something similar, please email me and I’ll be happy to send you the link. Also, a quote comes to mind right now. “In the midst of winter, I found there was, within me, an invincible summer.” ~Albert Camus. I sincerely hope you can find the “summer” in yourself sooner rather than later. Thoughts from Nebraska.

  4. Thinking of you all in this difficult time. I can’t imagine how you must be feeling right now. We are all out here rooting for BG and you two.

  5. Joy

    I normally lurk, rarely comment. But, I wanted you to know that I am sending prayers, good thoughts and hopes your way.

  6. tbean

    Thanks for this small update. Please, if you can muster the time/energy to do so, set up a paypal account so we can help. I know so many of us want to. Thinking of you three all the time.

  7. J

    I’m still in shock. I can’t even imagine. How did you even find out? Praying for you and yours.

  8. h.babypants

    I am so sorry to see these posts. You, your wife, and especially your Boy Genius are in my thoughts. I really wish there was something I could do to help or some words I could offer that would bring you strength. Just know that I am sending you all thoughts of courage, hope, and love.

  9. h.babypants

    I just tried to post a comment but it didn’t show up, so I am sorry if this is a duplicate. I am so sorry to see these posts. I wish there was something I could do to help or some words I could offer that would give you strength. Just know that I am sending you, your wife, and especially your Boy Genius, thoughts of courage, hope, and love. And please do set up a PayPal account. I am sure, like us, there are many people who would want the opportunity to support your family.

  10. chunkandmommy

    Oh my gosh. I have no words and I write this with tears in my eyes. I had NO idea as I missed the previous post. You are all in my thoughts and I simply cannot imagine what you are going through. You, J and C are now at the forefront of my thoughts and I am sending much love from the Midwest. Shit. I am so very sorry you are going through this. Hugs my friend.

  11. Ohmygod. I don’t know what to say. Fuck. I’m so sorry you guys are all going through this. I can’t believe it.

  12. Sending love and warm thoughts.

  13. I know that asking for money is not a fun or easy thing to do, but I know that there are so many of us who want to help, even if it’s just in a tiny way. Please do.

    Sending so much love and strength.

  14. Nic

    I came to you via another blog and there are no words to say. I know this as I have just supported my wife through a year of fighting breast cancer. You cannot do anything but survive in the moment. Just love each other and your boy and believe me when I say you can do it.
    Nic x

  15. I am so sorry you’re family has to go through this. Even if it’s not in your nature, accept all of the help you can get, monetary or otherwise. Letting people take on some of your burden is not only cathartic for them, it allows you to be at your best to take care of your son. A little piece of advice I learned the hard way, keep a pen and notebook with you at all times. Doctors have a way of popping in and giving you info when you’re not prepared or too exhausted to comprehend it. Having key points written down allows you to research it on your own time. Thinking of yor family and awaiting the PayPal button.

  16. My heart is breaking for you at the fear and heartache you are all feeling right now. Sending healing and love and light…. and do please let us all help a little financially. It makes us feel as though we can do a small thing to help you guys because we all wish we could do something more real than money.

  17. I am so sorry for this major upset in your family! Sending love and light to your family especially for BG as I am sure it is even harder for him to grasp what is happening.

  18. Emily

    A PayPal link is a good idea. Also reach out to the hospital social workers for anything they can help with: parking, meal vouchers, etc.

    If you haven’t connected with them yet, ask for the child life specialists. They will have a background in child development and can help with strategies for helping BG get through tests and treatments.

    Sending healing thoughts to BG and your family.

  19. emilyj67

    If we can help by contributing some money, you can eat and have a clean house — in order to focus on your sweet boy and his treatment. One step at a time. Such love to you.

  20. poppycat

    I desperately wish I lived closer to you so I could bring you some clean clothes, a warm home cooked meal and a shoulder to cry on. Please know that I would if I could. I’d like the info on a paypal account as soon as that is arranged. All our love to you.

  21. i just saw this news — my eyes are full of tears and my heart is breaking for you and your family. i am so sorry you are facing this scary diagnosis. i will be holding BG in my daily thoughts.

  22. Can you guys put together an amazon wish list? I would love to share it with friends and online to get stuff sent to you. Just anything you need, for yourself, for BG, toys, snacks, personal care stuff you may want or need help with, anything at all. You can set it up with a mailing address so people can just send it right to you. Let me know if I can help with coordinating that, I’d love to. lifewithroozle@gmail.com

  23. Amanda

    I’m a lurker who never comments but I just couldn’t do that this time. I haven’t read your blog in a few days and was shocked to see this when I came by. I am so sorry for what you three are going through. I just wanted you to know that you are definitely in my thoughts and prayers. I’ll be sending extra prayers for BG, may he fight through this. Sending love from Maryland.

  24. Dear BG and mommas, I came over here when Cindyhoo gave me your blog name on the FB group. My heart is full for you and your sweet boy. This is so cruel and unfair. Sending strength and love your way. I would love to help with a tiny but hugely meant donation.

  25. Carrie

    Just wanted to say our family is thinking of yours right now. Many many hugs.
    -Carrie (from eatpooplove)

  26. Kim

    Just got back from a week away with no internet or cell service to read this? I cannot believe it. I simply cannot believe it. I am so unbelievably sad for what you are going through right now. SO unfair. I am thinking of all of you. I will donate as well and do whatever I can. I might live near you guys…? so if that is the case I will see if there is anything I can do from here. Hang in there, and again, I’m just so, so sorry.

  27. Matilda

    Hugs from far away (from Sweden!). Have read your blog for a looooong time, but I don’t think I’ve ever commented before. I’m thinking of you.

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