I’ve been so gloomy this week, and today, the weather matches. The icing on my cake of crap this week was that I was given notice by the school I applied to that I won’t be asked to interview for either of the teaching positions. It’s okay. I’m suprisingly fine about it. I do miss teaching, but I would almost rather do some part-time teaching again so that taking care of my son and juggling schedules with my wife isn’t so daunting. Besides that, I want to be able to do at least some doula work, and teaching full time would only allow that during summer. There are always bright spots.
We’re still struggling here. My son is sick, and because of my lack of sleep, I’m not getting better. We’re all sleep-deprived, and my wife has thrown out her back and her shoulder. We are one big collective mess, and I wish I could just whisk us away from it all. My cat who just underwent surgery for a massive absess was given kitty morphine for us to administer. I think it’s fairly telling that my wife and I envy his drowsy, doped-up state a bit. While neither of us is really fond of how we feel on painkillers (and I hope I don’t need to mention we would never take our cat’s medication), the idea of mental escape is so alluring right now. Oh to be carefree and reckless again.
Honestly, I would give my left arm just to be able to lie on the couch and be sick for a day.