family doctor

Before Baby Genius was born, we tried to find him a pediatrician with little luck. During my pregnancy and for the first year of  his life, we have a form of state insurance that limits us greatly in our choices of medical care. We were told by our midwife that once in the hospital, we would be given a list of the pediatricians who take our insurance in our town. Since we were delivering at a hospital in a different town, we were to use the hospitalist (the house pediatricians) there and then would have Baby Genius’ new doctor check him out a day or two after we came home.

Well, in the hospital, no one seemed to have this list, and by the day we were heading home, we were still without a pediatrician. At this point, the hospitalist on duty came in, gave us a referral form, told us we were seeing Dr. X at Clinic X, and that was that. We were so happy that the decision was made and that we didn’t have to worry about it anymore.

The next day, when we visited the clinic where Dr. X practices, we were not so happy. The waiting room was the size of a large closet, and it was full of migrant workers and their children. I had to fill out forms vowing that we lived in a structure with running water and heat and not a cardboard box or abandoned vehicle. J waited outside with our three-day-old boy, and I, in my painful postpartum state, stayed in to fill out forms and to hear the call for our son. There were people coughing and sneezing all over the place, and we were certain our son was going to contract something rare and deadly.

Once we were called in, a very large German nurse was apalled that we would dare wait outside with our child. I was in tears; J was livid. It was awful. But then we met the doctor. He was a youngish guy–maybe in his late thirties or early forties–and he was very cheerful. He spoke equally to both of us, knowing immediately that we were a couple. He even corrected himself when he assumed my egg was used in the creation of Baby Genius. We were still reeling from the humiliation and fear brought on by the waiting room/nurse experience, but the doctor eased the sting a bit. On top of his inclsiveness of us as BG’s parents, his seeming effectiveness as a physician, and his good bedside manner with the baby, he was very pro-breastfeeding and seemed very much in line with the sort of doctor we would have chosen ourselves.

Baby Genius has been back to see his doctor a few times. Each time, one of us waits outside with the baby while the other waits in the waiting room, hand sanitizer at the ready. It has been working out, and the doctor remains a good fit for us despite his horrific location. (We really would move to a different physician if we had the option just because this place is so very much a place we don’t want to visit.)

And then today, he became an even better doctor. I was at our local market gathering some ingredients for dinner, and I spotted this man who looked familiar. I soon realized it was our son’s doctor, and as I looked over at him again, I realized there was another man behind him–with him. And then I looked again, and it was unmistakable: the other man was clearly the doctor’s slightly older significant other. Yes, our Baby Genius has himself a gay pediatrician, and for some reason, I’m pleased as punch.



Filed under Baby Genius

8 responses to “family doctor

  1. Karen

    Lol! That’s awesome… I would have been pleased too. I love it when someone I have to deal with just “gets it” without me having to educate or, worse, advocate.

  2. Yeah for the gay doc and that explains his being at that location to service a under served there a chance he works at a location that wouldn’t put BG at risk?

    People always thought I was crazy because I never took my dogs to the vet he came to us. And I strongly suggested new buyers ask the vet to come out to the car for vacs or be the very first patient of the day. And it was because of the transmission of desease to perfectly healthy animals.

  3. Well that definitely does seem like the sort of thing that would make the other bad stuff worth it (as long as he was competent which he is). We, too, don’t really like the office or waiting room of the office, but our pediatrician is so good with us and Miles, and even gave us a personal call one time, so we decided to stick with her.

  4. If there was a gay ped in my town, I’d go there first. I know it doesn’t mean anything about their creditials or expertise, but I just like working with other queers. They get our families and the challenges we face better than others – hopefully. I’m so glad your guy is a great doc and a great gay on top of it! ox

  5. Att

    That is so neat! I’ve been looking for a gay or gay-friendly OB/GYN for months and can’t seem to find a proper listing with that kind of information. It’s great that you stumbled upon one, by accident. I’m sorry he’s in a crap location, though, my partner’s PCP is in the worst clinic in our city (well, probably not worst) and she sometimes gets stuck getting IV chemo in a hallway all alone.

  6. Yay! That stuff always delights me too.

  7. poppycat

    From experience I had a feeling where this post was going. I am so happy to hear you have such a great doc dispite the location. And yes, it is nice to have a gay doc too. Our family doc is a gay man with two little girls via IUI that he coparents with the lesbian moms and an adopted boy of his own. He has become a friend to us as well as our doc and was instramental in our early education about how we could start out family. I swear I’ll cry a river if he ever leaves. I hope your new doc ends up being just as wonderful.

  8. HA! That is AWESOME. I love it!

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