Dear Baby Genius,
Tomorrow, you will be one month old–a whole month. For the last two nights, as you and I have laid awake in the quiet dark of 3:00am nursing, the full moon has been shining through the blinds at us. It distracts you from eating, and it reminds me that one lunar month ago, that same moon helped you come just a little bit early into my life. I watched that moon as we labored. Many, many months ago, I wished on that moon for you to even exist. You’re my little moon baby.
The past month, this first month of your life, has made me and your momma’s world so much smaller but in the most beautiful of ways. Whereas it once took a really good book or a pretty fabulous dinner to entertain us, we now revel in the little things. One of our favorite new pastimes is bathing you in our kitchen sink. You are so long now that you barely fit, but you love your baths, even if you do whimper a little when we put you in them. You are so peaceful as one of us pours the warm water over your body while the other washes you. You smell so dreamy when these baths are over. But you smell like a dreamy little baby all the time. I could never tire of burying my nose in your wispy blonde hair to take in your scent.
Another favorite pastime of ours is staring into your beautiful eyes. I remember our second night in the hospital after you were born, after we finally got the hang of breastfeeding together. You were awake, and you stared right into my eyes for so long, and I wept because I felt like I was finally meeting you. And in the first couple of days of having you home, you would wake up in the middle of the night to feed, and not yet ready to go back to sleep, you would open your eyes wide, and I would take you out to the sofa and turn on a dim light so that I could take advantage of these quiet alert moments of yours. You were so tiny and so new, and yet you harbored all the wisdom of the world in those eyes. Now, your eyes are open so much more, and your momma and I see smiles hidden in them. You melt us both with your gaze.
Speaking of smiles, you have been giving us practice grins, and we’ve both seen you give a couple of seemingly real ones. Just as fun is the laughing you do in your sleep. From time to time, a smile will creep across your sleeping face, and a chuckle will emerge from your mouth. These make me wonder if you must be remembering a previous life, or if life as our son is perhaps just really fun. I’d like to believe the latter.
You have been a good communicator since your first day. You open your mouth like a baby bird when you’re hungry, and you’re fairly patient most of the time. You don’t cry or fuss a lot, but when you do, it’s for good reason, and as long as we meet your needs, you soothe very easily. We know we’re really lucky so far, and we’re grateful for every day that you remain a calm and happy baby, for we are keenly aware that this could change.
Baby Genius, you are already proving to be an overachiever. From the first day we met you, you have acted older than your age. At just one day old, you lifted your head up off of your grandfather’s chest and stared into his eyes. You love to hold your head up, although you still lack control when it comes to lowering it back down, and sometimes you bonk your head on our chins. You like to use your strong legs to push yourself up, and kicking is a favorite activity of yours. In fact you regularly wake yourself up with your wild kicks, and you have taken to kicking your top leg while you nurse.
The people in your life adore you, baby boy. You are a special little soul, our beautiful chubby cherub. Your momma and I once strained to imagine what life would be like with you, and now we can’t imagine it without you. We wanted you for so long, and we walked around with Baby Genius-shaped holes in our hearts. Now that you’re here, those spaces are overflowing. We love you so much it aches, and we are so grateful you chose us. This past month has been the best of my life, and I look forward to all of the months and years we have ahead of us.
I love you to pieces, my son.