Yesterday, J and I had the loveliest of days. We went to our favorite local barbecue place (yep, I’m back on the meat), which is situated above a lovely babbling creek and surrounded in oak trees (in fact, just across the creek is one of our favorite walking trails). We spent a lot of time just reveling in the day, the spring, the new sort of love we’re sharing. Of course, a beautiful day and a lovely location such as this prompted photographs as well.
I have been promising belly shots for some time, but before now, I haven’t had much to show. Granted, I had a belly, but that belly was created by the consumption of really good wine and exceptionally good cheese over the past year of living in wine country. It really didn’t have much to do with Egghead. Until last week, that is. It seems that last week, I developed an honest-to-goodness baby bump.
This is a fairly padded bump, so at times I look about a month ahead of where I really am, but that’s okay. Strangers have been giving me that “Is she or isn’t she?” look, but people who know me are quite impressed at my sudden bumpiness. Believe it or not, they think I actually look pregnant.
Honestly, most days I’m still in denial. I know I’m pregnant, but it doesn’t seem real, and when I look at myself from the front, I barely see it, but then I put on a shirt that fit me just a month ago, and it rides up to expose my belly, and I realize I’m actually growing–this isn’t just some freakish weight gain (in fact, I’m still at my pre-pregnancy weight). I can’t explain why it is so hard to fully accept or grasp, but when I see pictures of myself, I guess it’s a bit harder to deny that I’m really pregnant.
So I’m coming to accept it, beginning to realize that this ever-changing belly is really mine and that it isn’t getting harder because I’m somehow unwittingly doing pilates in my sleep. Nope, there’s a real, live Egghead in there, and s/he is growing! Tomorrow is seventeen weeks. Seventeen! We’re almost half-way there. I’m a little stunned.