conflicted

There are many, many really big reasons I wish Prop 8 hadn’t passed, but one of the more petty reasons is that it is disrupting my life. I am at a point in the semester when I need to be spending all of my free time grading if I am ever going to come up for air, but instead, I’m focused on what we’re going to do about all this. J and I want to focus on our health and on baby-making, but instead, we are bickering over whether or not our time on Sunday would be best spent at a rally in Sacramento. Every day seems to bring something regarding this damn amendment that interferes with life as we need to live it, and it’s pissing me off.

I want to be a good queer activist and get out there and march, but I need to get my car smogged, order parts for our other car, grade papers, do laundry, clean the house, read my students’ assigned reading, shop for groceries, and so much more. How does one do the activist thing and live a normal life too? My guess is one doesn’t. That’s why so many protesters are college students. Skip class to protest? Cool! I know. I used to be there. But how does someone like me forget all of these obligations and go yell for four hours? And if I do, what does that do for our cause? Is it fair to sacrifice my teaching for this? Should my students suffer because we want to go stand with our people?

Honestly, I don’t know, and this is a source of tension in my household tonight. Ugh. I hate tension.

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4 Comments

Filed under conflicts, Marriage Equality Resources, Prop 8

4 responses to “conflicted

  1. Pardon me while I hang out in the shadows and speak up for a moment…. don’t underestimate your voice and it’s reach. You might not be at some rally on Sunday and that’s ok. On Sunday your voice will be heard as one with the crowd… anonymous…. but here, I hear YOU loud and clear and your voice is reaching all the way to Canada and beyond!

    I’m sorry that you and your partner are unable to share the same luxuries as those here in Ontario.

    D

    PS…. came here via http://cindysblog-bangheadhere.blogspot.com/

  2. NG

    Help is always appreciated on the online front too.

  3. Sky

    I think getting a Massachusetts phone book and ordering all your christmas gifts (if you celebrate) out of it over the phone could make more of a difference than whether you show up at a protest. If enough people did that and the media reported it. You would have to pay shipping but if you have relatives in other parts of the country you would be shipping them gifts anyway. I havent heard anyone talking about the stupidity of people to vote for a prop. that hurts this state economically during a recession. As a straight person I dont have the same emotional reaction to 8 passing, but the type of people I had to argue with about weather if it passed schools would be teaching gayness to kids dont care how many people show up to a protest but they do care about the economy.

  4. I also think that this is going to be a very long battle. I’m sure other chances will arise for you to get out and yell. I was very active canvassing for Kerry in 2004. This year I didn’t get to get out at all because of the baby. But guess what? A handful of people whom I dragged along with me four years ago went out to swing states dragging new folks with them. You do what you do when you can. Right now you can blog and send letters. So blog and send letters. It is way better than doing nothing.

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