Summer Insemination Ramblings

Time is slipping by so quickly! During the school year, I always think of summer as this long, luxurious span of time during which I will complete countless projects, read stacks of books, create new curriculum for my classes in the fall, and nap endlessly. Then summer arrives, stays for a moment, and it’s gone. Such is life this summer as well. Granted, we don’t hit summer officially until the end of this week, but for me summer begins in mid-May when I grade the last paper and submit my final grades.

 The reason I know time is slipping by quickly is that we are already closing in on insemination #2 at the end of the week. I like the idea of inseminating around the summer solstice, not to mention during the waxing moon. The timing should be really lovely and hopefully quite lucky. J and I have been building up our baby altar weekly. Last week it gained a giant egg-shaped moonstone and a bouquet of lavendar from farmer’s market. We’ll add to it again this week to celebrate the solstice and insem. #2.

But I have to say, I don’t feel anymore prepared this time around. I hate not knowing what my body will decide to do any given month. Will I ovulate on the 14th day of my cycle? The 16th day? Or will my ovaries really throw me for a loop and pop one out on the 18th? It’s seriously frustrating, especially with the shipping matter. You see, we can’t receive overnight shipments on Sundays or Mondays; therefore, if ovulation happens on Monday, it’ll be difficult to conceive. Oh, the madness!

I’m beginning to learn that the week leading up to insem time is even more crazy-making than the TWW. I am, after all, a control freak.

I do hope this takes this time. Mr. Goodman will be leaving the country for a couple of months beginning July, so we will have to wait for future shipments until September. If it doesn’t happen this cycle, the break would be good, for it would allow me more time to work on my health, but J and I are eager to get this going.

In some ways, this whole trying to conceive process feels like one of those games in the midway at a county fair or carnival where there are a bunch of fishbowls on a rotating table, and you have to throw a ping-pong ball in to get a prize–maybe a Bon Jovi poster or a huge stuffed zebra, or the very best: a goldfish. The game seems simple, and it really is. Just throw the ball, and land it in a bowl. Anyone playing this game knows that if you throw enough ping-pong balls at the fishbowls, that eventually you’ll get one in, but the whole damn table keeps moving, and it really is up to chance when your ball will land in a bowl. One of these days–hopefully sooner than later–we’ll get to bring home our prize goldfish.


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Filed under Ramblings, Summer, ttc

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